Post by Doc on Jul 9, 2005 2:10:09 GMT -5
Sent: Friday, July 08, 2005 10:14 AM
Subject: Govt. Employee Evaluations
Subject: Evaluations:
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> > These are actual quotes taken from Federal Government employee performance evaluations.
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> > 1. "Since my last report, this employee has reached rock-bottom and has started to dig."
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> > 2. "I would not allow this employee to breed."
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> > 3. "This employee is really not so much of a has-been, but more of a definite won't be."
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> > 4. "Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap."
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> > 5. "When she opens her mouth, it seems that it is only to change feet."
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> > 6. "This young lady has delusions of adequacy."
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> > 7. "He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them."
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> > 8. "This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot."
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> > 9. "This employee should go far, and the sooner he starts, the better."
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> > 10. "Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold
> > it all together."
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> > 11. "A gross ignoramus -- 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus."
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> > 12. "He doesn't have ulcers, but he's a carrier."
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> > 15. "He's been working with glue too much."
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> > 16. "He would argue with a signpost."
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> > 17. "He brings a lot of joy whenever he leaves the room."
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> > 18. "When his IQ reaches 50, he should sell."
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> > 19. "If you see two people talking and one looks bored, he's the other one."
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> > 20. "A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on."
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> > 21. "A prime candidate for natural de-selection."
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> > 22. "Donated his brain to science before he was done using it."
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> > 23. "Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming."
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> > 24. "He's got two brains cells, one is lost and the other is out looking for it."
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> > 25. "If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week."
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> > 26. "If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get change."
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> > 27. "If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean."
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> > 28. "It's hard to believe he beat out 1,000,000 other sperm."
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> > 29. "One neuron short of a synapse."
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> > 30. "Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; he only gargled."
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> > 31. "Takes him 2 hours to watch '60-minutes'."
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> > 32. "The wheel is turning, but the hamster is dead
I had the plastic thingy, really I did, but I threw it away by mistake........
